- By Marin McCue
What is Inner Wellness? What does it mean to you? What does it look like? What does it feel like? How do you keep consistent with the positive changes you start bringing into your life?
Each one of us is a unique combination of past experience, programming, beliefs, actions, ideas, goals, abilities, successes, struggles, and potential. The way you learn, the way you perceive the world around you, and the way you handle what life offers you, is completely different from anyone else in the world, and the unique qualities persist as you change, adapt, evolve, grow, discover, break down, and re-build.
Inner-Wellness will look, feel, and mean something different based on everything else that makes up the matrix of being a unique-human, a unique-YOU. However, there are three universal RULES that I believe everyone could benefit from embracing
We naturally compare ourselves to others because it is an “easy” way to gauge our progress, our “worth”, our contribution, etc. Which brings me to my first universal RULE of inner-wellness…
Universal RULE #1
Let-go of Comparisons
Your journey has brought you to where you are now. Your own growth, learning, and possible directions are completely unique to the situation and life that you have created. Look to others for inspiration, for support, for ideas, but then, let it go. Let go of thinking you need to be like someone else. Let go of thinking that if you were someone else things would be better, easier, more fun – because everyone has their own struggle to live with. Let go of obsessing over what others have. Focus on YOU. Focus on what you have learned, how strong you are, how excited you are for your present and your future. Focus on forging your own path, one that has not been explored because it is your own creation. Focus on bringing your unique qualities to the surface, because the world needs what YOU have to offer.
So, easier said than done, right? The best things in life are simple, but not easy. Some days you will feel like nothing can stop you, you are unshakeable, rooted to your purpose, anchored to your passion; while other days may feel like no matter what you do nothing turns out right, and absolutely everything takes the energy out of you. Why? WHY?????
Universal RULE #2
Embrace the ‘Valleys’ as much as the ‘Peaks’
A "Happy Person" (aka Inner-Wellness) is not a person in a certain set of circumstances, but rather a person with a certain set of attitudes - a love for learning, a growth mindset, an ability to let-go of baggage, and a consistent understanding of the importance of pushing outside your "comfort zone." Although this sometimes requires letting go of momentary happiness/comfort, and embracing struggle, pain, and sadness, the result is a feeling of triumph, satisfaction, and a wealth of knowledge from pushing yourself outside of the familiar, the comfortable, the “easy”.
"The good life is best constructed as a matrix that includes happiness, occasional sadness, a sense of purpose, playfulness, and psychological flexibility, as well as autonomy, mastery, and belonging" - Psychology Today by Robert Biswas-Diener and Todd B. Kashdan.
So, what can you do to make those tough days few and far between?
Universal RULE #3
It is said that 77% of what the average person things is negative, self-defeating, or counter-productive. 77%!!! Imagine how powerful and happy you could feel if that number was reversed, or even reduced by 20%. Where your mind goes, energy flows. If you are thinking about your struggles, your worries, your fears, or sitting in comparisons, regrets, or living for the future, that will be your reality. Your mind naturally is on the lookout for threats and danger, there is no need for you to waste your conscious thoughts on things that do not uplift and empower you. Why waste time focusing on what you don’t have? Why waste time beating yourself up for something that didn’t go well or feel as good as you had hoped it would? Why waste energy on dread, on defeat, on pessimism? Feel it, learn from it, and then let it go and focus on filling your mind with thoughts that empower and uplift you. Focus on the advantages of where you are now. Focus on what you are grateful for. Focus on your passion, your purpose, your love for yourself and for those people you choose to surround yourself with.
Obviously there are a number of other things you can do to create a life thriving with Inner-Wellness (like SWEAT EVERYDAY, create something, smile, SPIN, etc.), but the above three RULES are the root to having the energy, the motivation, the drive, and the support needed to be consistent and endlessly eager to continue your unique journey to your Inner-Wellness.
Check out www.dopeame.com for more tips and inspiration on living with intention and creating the life you want. Also find out more information about my "Creat and Paint your Goals" workshops. My next one is this Thursday ( June 25th)!
Have an amazing day and remember…..
“The sooner you step away from your comfort zone; the sooner you’ll realize that it really wasn’t all the comfortable” – Eddie Harris Jr.